Okay, not “they.” Just one of them. A young Russian lady, formerly of Squirrel Hill, has posted a hateful and very personal review on Amazon. How do I know that this lady, who identified herself on Amazon only as “fluffy,” is from Squirrel Hill? Easy. She first posted an equally mean comment on this blog, signed it, but then removed it (smart girl!). I’m not sure what the point of her outburst (I mean, review) was. She seems to be under the impression that writers earn loads of money. Oh, and she called me self-hating, which is kind of cool. That’s what critics called Philip Roth, and look where it got him!
Aside from this, though, the reviews have been good – see the new ones from the Moscow Times and LA Times -- and what makes me most happy is how positively the reviewers see the characters in the book. They see them as sympathetic, struggling, and human. They identify with them. So no matter how conflicted I might feel about real or fictional Squirrel Hill, I think I’ve done my characters justice.
What I’ve been wondering lately is how this online culture of ours, with its forums and blogs, seems to encourage meanness, pettiness, and outright abuse. Take, for example, Steve Almond’s tender, beautiful Babble.com blog on parenting. And who is this stalker-like troll who week after week posts the most obnoxious comments, in which he insults Steve, his books, and his family? What personal agenda is at play here? What sort of sick satisfaction does he (or she?) derive from this exercise?
Others get attacked as well. Parents get criticized for their parenting. Immigrants get flamed on immigrant forums – just because someone is having a bad day. A months or so ago, a well-known writer got torn apart on Gawker.com when a personal e-mail about his family situation got “leaked” into the cyber world. Now, I’ve met this author on a couple of occasions, and each time he was gracious and generous. But the Gawker crowd doesn’t care. To them, he was fresh meat, and though they’d never met him – and some had never heard of him -- they nevertheless attacked him in the most vicious and personal way.
The scary thing is, in regular life, these might be normal, maybe slightly gossipy, but basically well-meaning people. But in the privacy of the Internet they turn into monsters. I wonder what makes them lash out like that. The media? The boredom? The repression of their day-to-day lives? I don’t know.
When the mean-spirited comment appeared on this blog, Movie Dictator said, Delete it! And though I hesitated for a moment – free speech and all – he convinced me. “It’s your blog,” he said. “It’s your space. And you don’t want anyone to poison it.” Which is true. It’s not a public forum. And while I love getting questions and responses – whether from friends or people I don’t know -- I don’t need abuse. Fortunately, before I could get to it, the poster was gracious enough to remove her own comment.
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3 comments:
Unfortunately, it seems like the price that comes with fame. On the other hand, it's the only negative review you've received. Given that it's more of a personal attack than a real review, I'd say you're doing great. What I also loved are the reviews which followed the nasty one! I think the people that love your book far outnumber the few disgruntled folks who find themselves unable to appreciate the bigger picture painted by the book.
So no matter how conflicted I might feel about real or fictional Squirrel Hill, I think I’ve done my characters justice.
Love this.
A months or so ago, a well-known writer got torn apart on Gawker.com
I used to read Gawker, then got bored and didn't give it any thought for a long while, then saw this video where Jimmy Kimmel takes a really annoying Gawker editor to task for their "celebrity stalker map."
I could go on and on about this person, but suffice it to say that afterwards the woman defended herself on Fox News, which was very sympathetic to her.
When the mean-spirited comment appeared on this blog, Movie Dictator said, Delete it!
MD was right, and you did the right thing. The late Steve Gilliard, who ran a great blog with lots of regular commenters and high-energy discussions, once wrote that he ran his blog like a bar. If somebody came in and crossed the line, they got thrown out, period. My blog hardly ever gets comments, so I haven't given much thought to what "the line" should be, other than obvious offenses like spam, but there should be a line.
Free speech means idiots have a right to speak out on their own blog. It doesn't mean you're obliged to let them speak out on your blog.
This fluffy woman seems to me like a lunatic, frankly. It's a great book. You rock.
Deb
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